Help please🙏🏻Found his frequent scrolling through girls' profiles before the wedding

Good morning!

I sense how anxious you are. That’s why it’s no surprise you’re reaching out for help.

But effective support will only come when it’s directed at your personal feelings, desires, values, and beliefs. And when it helps you establish a view of the situation that’s as close to reality as possible.

Do you agree with this approach?

So, what evidence are you looking for?

There’s only a week left before the wedding, and I keep searching for proof because my heart isn’t at ease.

And last night, somehow, I found out he’s scrolling through profiles of different girls almost every day. Everything’s been cleaned up, but you can still tell.

Based on your feelings, what future do you imagine if you can’t trust your partner?

Without trust, what feelings do you have for him? Are they enough for you to get married?

What worries me is that I told him I was against him meeting other girls, even if they’re just friends.

Yes, you did say that. How did he respond to your words/requests/demands?

We’ve been together for five years, but from the very beginning, there’s been no passion. And that summer, there were only about two months of sex. At the time, he’d say he didn’t want it—my butt wasn’t the right shape, or I wasn’t inviting him to it the right way.

What did his behavior reveal about his attitude toward you? Did you ever feel belittled or devalued?

Let me explain: with my questions, I’m trying to draw your attention to aspects you shouldn’t overlook. They serve as markers of well-being—or, conversely, negative aspects in the relationship. Now, it’s up to you to decide what to do next.

I think it would be helpful to attend at least one or two sessions with a psychologist to explore your feelings more deeply. That way, you can move beyond the state of

a little in the sh…

and make a decision that’s truly in your best interest—not under pressure or out of fear.

Good afternoon. It’s interesting that even after five years, you still don’t feel calm, desired, and confident around this person. The reason can’t lie solely with you—your partner (perhaps unconsciously) may be provoking this situation.

It’s better to have an honest conversation now and, if needed, delay a decision than to spend your whole life regretting that you didn’t listen to yourself. Marriage should begin with trust, not with searching for evidence.

If you can’t clarify this openly in conversation, consider attending a joint session with a family therapist. In the past, such consultations were offered directly at the registry office, and it’s a very useful experience for newlyweds before the wedding.