Why Don’t You Just… Get Married!

From childhood, girls dream of a fashionable wedding dress and a sparkling, rhinestone-encrusted veil. Unfortunately, that’s often where their vision of marriage ends. Sure, there’s supposed to be a white horse with a noble prince riding it, a bag of money meant just for her–the one and only. But years pass. The wedding dress style they imagined as children has gone out of fashion three times over. Their girlfriends have scattered into their own social circles, each with their own children.

"Don’t just sit at home–go somewhere!" declares the mother, who has resigned herself to the fact that her daughter is now grown up (she just blew out 30 candles on a Barbie-shaped birthday cake). But the daughter stubbornly stays home, spending her evenings with the ever-reliable internet.

"I’m not going anywhere! I don’t need anyone! I support myself! Marriage isn’t trendy! I can always put on the yoke later!"

Sound familiar? These are the phrases you often hear from single friends. But don’t believe them. There are no yokes for sale at the market. And social trends don’t concern them much. In reality, they want to get married so badly it’s almost a scream. A piglet’s squeal! Even if it’s not in a beautiful dress with a sparkling veil, and not to a blue-blooded prince with a sack of money. To someone! And unfortunately, that someone is nowhere to be found.

But why? Why do outwardly charming and even financially secure little ones never become wives–neither official nor common-law? Let’s try to figure it out.

The Eternal Search for the Ideal

From the little princess that well-meaning moms and dads stubbornly raise, an absolute fruit is bound to grow: self-absorbed, pampered. And inevitably vulnerable. Even at 40, the daughter remains a delicate little girl.

"You deserve the best!" her mother says, hinting at her good-for-nothing father, whom she’d love to divorce–if only there were a better option on the horizon.

And then, as if to add insult to injury, there’s the happy marriage of a cousin who managed to snag a rich, dark-haired man with an apartment. The princess’s crown gets in the way. Every new candidate for a relationship, as soon as he appears on the horizon, is actively discussed with Mom. She, after all, definitely knows what kind of man her daughter needs. The flaws of the potential son-in-law are examined under a magnifying glass.

Short stature, unremarkable eyes, dislike of Bach, an ugly last name, a non-prestigious profession, inability to eat with chopsticks, loud laughter at flat jokes–this is just a short list of what makes Mom (yes, MOM!) deliver the verdict: You deserve better.

The search for the ideal, fueled by constant comparisons to the successes of neighbors, classmates, and older sisters, continues as long as… Mom is alive. Unfortunately (let the decent, compassionate daughters pelt me with food waste). As a result, you’re over 60, your libido has faded, adult movies have long since lost their appeal, no depilator can handle the hair on your chin, and it turns out your cousin’s husband has had a mistress his whole life. Where are you, ugly Bach-hater with a small salary and squinty eyes? Speak up!

No One Needs You

Alright, my dear potential brides. Accept the fact that in this age of progress and advanced kitchen technology, men (in the status of official wife) don’t need you. Unless your grandfather was a chauffeur for the Rockefellers and they left him a little something in their will as a token of gratitude for his loyal service. And the older you get, the further the boat of happy family life sails away from you.

But why?

It’s simple. A successful man supports himself. He has a housekeeper who comes and goes unnoticed, a kitchen full of cooking and reheating appliances, and he eats at restaurants. Why would he trade his boundless creative freedom for borscht and cherry varenyky, when every evening he can have a new girlfriend–always fresh, always young–while lawful wives tend to age, gain weight, and start scandals? And, after all, even borscht with cherries can give you heartburn.

To get married, you need to be someone. A successful man wants a partner by his side–an intellectually sharp, witty woman with a profession and a sense of humor, with her own living space and optimism in her eyes. A woman who is his equal in every way. Because, to himself, he is a hero!

Your Own Laziness and Fears

Being a wife is an art. It’s a service, knowing when to keep silent and when to speak up in defense if the situation demands it. It’s about waking up two hours before the alarm to make him an omelet, pancakes, porridge, or brownies–all while looking fresh and natural. And God forbid you even think of criticizing his mother… or his grandmother.

In short, if you want to get married, be prepared to take on a ton of responsibilities and "bite your tongue"–pardon the expression.

Sometimes, behind the mask of not wanting to get married lies a banal fear of growing up. After all, it’s much easier to live off your parents, who let you sleep until noon and justify your avoidance of household chores. Why build your own relationships in your own family when you can always observe others’?

Another reason a daughter never gets married is fear. Fear of failure, fed by a series of childhood complexes instilled by those same parents.

If you’re well over 30 and haven’t even lived with someone for a couple of weeks in a trial cohabitation–go see a specialist. It will only get worse: for you, with your unbearable character, and for your parents, who will inevitably age alongside you and your personal problems. In short, a vicious circle.

Machine translated to English 13-06-2026